Bitter Revenge
by Wolfhound159
Summary: Lisbon fires Jane in a reckless endangerment. As revenge, Jane does good on his long forgotten promise.


**Author's Note:**

 **I'm sorry for my absence. I am really trying to come back, but it's been extremely difficult. I miss this show terribly, and I can't imagine how it must feel for you guys too. This is my way of trying to come back... Again. I am extremely behind in many of your wonderful fan fictions to read, and I'm extremely sorry about that. I want to read them all, but I haven't had the privilege, and they got so backed up, that just the number alone frightens and overwhelms me. I will try to see if I can start to read them this summer, going from oldest to newest, and I'm not making any promises to read them all, but I will try my very best and leave a comment for all of you lovely people out there.**

 **This one-shot, I wanted to make it a fun, cute little thing, but as I kept writing, it got a bit more distorted and strange. And it can be interpreted as many things. It is, however, a cruel and hateful look towards these two characters. I was thinking of making this into a chapter fic, but there's a possibility I could just get anxious with it and kill them off. For now, however, it will remain as a one-shot that has the possibility of becoming a two-shot and having a nice ending instead.**

 **Once again, I'm sorry if I hurt anyone with this, or if I hurt anyone with my disappearance.**

* * *

" _I could marry you off in a minute." he told her, a serious complexion on his face. "Don't tempt me."_

 _She stared at him as he continued to walk away. She was trying to discern if he was lying or not. She shrugged before walking into her office to get started on the massive pile of paperwork._

Lisbon glared at him, anger and hurt fueling the words that came pouring out of her mouth. Jane was equally pissed, his fists clenched by his side.

"You asshole!" she growled at him, "What was going through your mind when you thought that offering a minor as bait to a serial killer was a good idea?!"

"I had everything under control; you're getting worked up for nothing." He spoke cool and collected, however the turmoil going on inside his veins was anything but.

"Yeah," she scoffed, "So that's why she got killed and I got shot protecting _you_."

"It was your fault, if you hadn't shown up and broken that pot, she would still be alive."

"She shouldn't have been out there in the first place, Jane! She was 15 YEARS OLD. A minor."

"Did you have a better plan?"

" _Anything_ would've been a better plan than sacrificing Emily."

"She wanted to help! If I hadn't told her where to go, she would've been killed anyway."

"You're just a jerk." She spoke, tears prickling her eyes. "You're through working for us. Pack your stuff and leave." She didn't give him a chance to see her tears overflow out of her eyes, as she walked past him and into her office quickly.

He stood there, looking at her for a long while, his anger still coursing through his veins.

 _ **How dare she blame me for Emily's death.**_ He thought, _**it was her fault anyway. Stupid girl trying to be a hero.**_ He walked up to his office in the Attic and looked around. _**I know it's here somewhere.**_ He shuffled through the multitude of papers on his desk before finding the one he wanted. He smiled wickedly, _**This will teach you not to mess with me, Lisbon.**_

He took the slip of paper to the courthouse, slipping inside and paying the fee before handing it to the overly friendly woman at the desk.

"Are you sure you want this, sir?" She smirked softly.

"Yes." He confirmed with a bit of a stoic face, his eyes never leaving the signature on the paper.

"And is she here with you?"

"No. She's at work."

The woman nodded, typing the information down in the database before stamping the paper and handing it back to Jane.

"Congratulations," she spoke, sounding a bit rehearsed, "I wish you luck in your marriage."

Jane nodded, looking down at the paper. He walked out to the car and set the paper down in the passenger seat. _**I told you not to tempt me, Lisbon.**_ He drove on his way to his hotel, flashing a quick look at the CBI Parking ID hanging from his rearview mirror. _**It may not do much to you, but it will piss you off when you realize I married you off.**_ He pulled into his parking space at the hotel, taking the paper and entering his dark, empty room. _**You're going to flip when you learn you're married to me.**_

XXXXXX

Lisbon pounded on the door, not caring that she was making a scene. It was 5 weeks later when Grace found her information on the CBI Database changed and stated that she was married. When she confronted her boss, Lisbon asked her to find who it was that it said she was married to. Grace had to enter into the public database in the courthouse to find that information. Lisbon glared at the name staring at her from the screen. A Mr. Patrick Jane.

Jane opened the door with messy curls and strapping a simple pajamas pant, his pupils dilated to the point where the blue of his eyes was covered by black. Lisbon pushed past him, taking a quick look at his destroyed hotel room before turning to face him, crossing her arms to avoid punching him with all the rage she had.

"What," She seethed once he closed the door, "is _wrong_ with you?!"

"What are you referring to, Lisbon?"

"Really?" She spoke, annoyed, "Stop playing stupid, Jane. _Fix it_."

"Fix what?"

"You know what."

"No, I truly don't."

"So you have no idea why it says that we're married?"

He had to hold back the smirk that threatened to arise. "No."

She didn't believe him. "I know you had something to do with it, Jane. Fix it."

"Look," He spoke softly, trying to take the blame off of him, "Why would I file for our marriage if we haven't spoken in over a month."

"I don't know!" She yelled, aggravated, "You're a manipulative jerk; I never know what's going on in your mind!"

"Ouch," He said, although her words barely fazed him.

She continued to glare at him, her eyes sending daggers into his. He stared back, his eyes never leaving hers as he used most of his energy from bursting into laughter.

"I'm going to kill you." She bit out, angrily, tears threatening to surface, "I'm going to strangle you with your stupid belt."

He smirked softly, "Why threaten me, Lisbon? I didn't do this."

"Then who?" She challenged, "Who could have POSSIBLY married us against our will?"

"You never stopped to think who would want to distract us while they run undetected? For all we know, it could've been Red John. Or that ex boyfriend of yours, Walter Mashburn." He waved a hand through the air, his face screwed up in a mask of disgust and indifference.

Lisbon stayed silent, looking at him with a critical and determining face. When she finally finished deciding, she dropped her arms, glaring at him as she walked closer to him.

"Prove it wasn't you." She stated, her voice calm.

"How?"

"Come with me to get a divorce. You sign the papers, and I won't punch you."

"Why?"

"What do you mean why?"

"Why?" He said again, more determinately, "Why would we ruin the perfect cover for Red John?"

"What?" She asked confused.

He wanted to keep annoying her longer; he couldn't let her off the hook so soon. "Red John believes we're going to be distracted with figuring out who married us that he's going to make appearances, and be sloppier because we're not paying as much attention to him. We let him believe that until we can capture him. It's the perfect accidental disguise."

"Why would you think I would _ever_ agree to that? I fired you! You're not working with us anymore, what would be the point?"

"Exactly!" He emphasized, "That's the point."

"What is?"

"That we're going to be chasing our tails. Or that's what we're going to pretend we're doing."

"I hate you." She spoke after a moment of silence, a slight glimmer of tears in her eyes, " _I hate you._ "

She slammed out of the room and left as quickly as she could. He let out a deep laugh the minute he heard her car screeching away. _**I'm going to enjoy this.**_


End file.
